Chapter 7 almost finished

There was a plot development too. Plot is a rare guest in my writing, so that's an achievement. :-D
The draft is now over eleven thousand words, coming close to the biggest chunk of literature text I ever wrote. But of course the story is still in the very beginning. I wonder how far I will be able to go before I give up or before the story is finished...

Also, I just read my previous post and noticed mistakes there. I am "up for a challenge", not "ready" for it, and I "do my best under pressure", not "work my best".

Going back to the story. I introduced two new characters, and one of them will reappear and play a significant role in the story later on. Also, I am having problems writing the dialogs. I can hear waht every character says and thinks, but it is difficult to get that understanding on paper without overloading the text with descriptions. Ideally the intonation must be obvious from the selection of words and their order in character's speech, but I am not that good. Well, I keep telling myself I will deal with this on the editing stage, after the whole story is written down. It helps in not getting stucked over my currently crippled text. :-)

Yay! Started chapter 7!

Basically, nothing happens there, it's just a description of the transitional period after the funeral. I don't even know what do I feel about it, but the important thing is: I started writing again!
I also rewrote chapter 6 in past tense. For some reason, I've written chapters 1-3 in past tense, and chapters 4-6 in present tense. Since past tense works better for this particular story, I would need to rewrite 4-5 chapters too, but that is saved for editing stage which is so far ahead it feels it will never come.

Having someone who enjoys reading the story really helps.

Also, I've got my first interview for Auckland. The company, that wanted a test consultant for Christchurch, is keen to interview me, and they agreed to consider me for Auckland team. I am still not sure if I'm ready for the challenge (according to a friendly recruter, the challenge is big for a new kiwi), but I can do an interview, and I still basically like the company. Also, if my past is any indicator, I work my best under the pressure.

Look, look, a new update!

Immigration

1) Rachel, the recruter from Christchurch, seduced me to try one more position. She sent my CV, and we are now waiting for a feedback from the company representative. The company itself seems very promising, I can already see a challenge to grow as professional and to give it my best! So, fingers crossed. Maybe they'll like me for the job. Though I must say, the position implies perfect verbal English skills, and I am not so sure in mine. I mean, my English seems decent, but I have never tested it in real life with lots of accents, fast natural speed and few people talking at the same time. I'll probably need few weeks just to get used to English around me. And it's not even the biggest problem! I forget words and mix times when I speak. I write much better, and as you can see, my writing is also far from perfect. Huh... but maybe it's okay and they are used to this kind of problem. After all, New Zealand is a country of immigrants.

2) We arranged a meeting for tomorrow with the recruter from Auckland to talk about next steps in finding a job for me in Auckland. Auckland stays the city of choice for me, though I am not opposed to starting in some other New Zealand city as long as the job is interesting.

Writing

1) This morning I spent some time and moved all the words (vocabulary project) from here to my WorkFlowy account. They are now listed in few nice categories that hopefully will help me to find a word I want to use more quickly.

2) My article on testing is finally ready and approved for publication. Three parts will be published on the Ministry of Testing site on August 18, 19 and 20. Thanks to Simon (the editor) and his enormous patience and friendliness text actually looks not that bad. I made so many mistakes though, that I was ashamed to read edited text today. Really! I'm not proud. Is this how I write when I don't have anyone to edit my writing for me? Frustrating... but motivating too! When I see my writing published, I might want to write something else! Especially if I get any feedback from the readers. That would be awesome. :-)

3) And there is also one thing I noticed that isn't about writing in English, but is about writing in general. Last few weeks (maybe more) I don't feel the urge to have long discussions with people on my blog. I am happy just writing something and leaving it there. If somebody disagrees, I'm okay with that. If somebody adds an interesting angle to the topic, I am glad to read it, and think about it, and say "thank you". But I want to run from actually writing a long thought-through answer. That is not very good of me. Maybe it's just one of those times, when I don't really need any people around me.

I suppose in few months I would regret not using this few weeks in Omsk in fullest, for meeting everyone here I know.

The only thing related to immigration and writing in English I did today was discussing the English language itself with my friend and then with my mom.

Many people I know from my job (both Gehtsoft and Yandex) moved either to USA or to England. Many of them live near NY and NJ (but not on Braiton Beach, nope).

I'll be the first one in New Zealand amongst my friends, but not the first one amongst people I know independently of immigration process. So many people are running from Russia... I can only hope everyone who wants to get away will be able to do it. It's getting more and more ridicilous every day.

Hali:Procrastination - 0:1

After the last post I did a whole month more of procrastination. Well, not a complete and non-stop one, but... I better start from the beginning.

Last ten days in Saint Petersburg (I left July 9) were spent on saying good byes and organizing my stuff. Sadly I had to get rid of about one third of my prescious books... several people most of whom I have never seen before came and exchanged them for chocolate. Actually, I had so much chocolate at the end, that I gave it to anyone I could, and I ate it for days, and I still brought three chocolate bars with me to Omsk. Aside from books I tried to give away almost everything I owned, but with little success. I was able to find new homes for most of the electronics, and a lot of things I had to simply throw away on my last day in town. That was good stuff. I feel deeply uncomfortable about good stuff going to rubbish, so I hope someone took it from there.

My friends were awesome those last days. Two of them actually came from Moscow just to say good bye to me! And we had few gatherings, and chatted a lot, and they were all very supportive, and glad for me, and sad of having to say good bye... I am blessed with those people, and I am grateful for them. I'll miss them (and someone I miss already).

And then I was in Omsk, which is my home city. I'm staying with my parents (well, with my mom, and step dad, and the youngest of my brothers, who is 11) at their place. Couldn't bring myself to visit my old appartment where currently my other brother is living. My beloved cat died this winter when I was away, and I don't think I can manage going to that place, and expect him there, and not having him there for the first time in 12 years...

Anyway. I spend my days here, and there is constantly someone near me. I forgot how much I love being alone, how much do I need it. Now, this very moment, is the first time in weeks when no one except me is home. This is quite liberating. Maybe because I don't feel fully comfortable most of the time, I couldn't bring myself to continue wtiting.

Well, I edited that article for Testing planet (which is now united with Ministry of testing website) twice. Found out that I am really bad in writing articles, especially when it comes to summaries and introductions. I need some practice with that before I can move forward. As for now, I am currently waiting for the next portion of feedback from the editor. I wonder if my article will be published there after all. If not, I'll just take it to the "Testing" community on LinkedIn, I guess.

Great news about New Zealand are that I got my passport back from London yesterday. It now has a page with the New Zealand residence visa. I am a resident, how cool is that? :-) I already bought tickets to Auckland and booked a hotel stay for the first two weeks. I'm leaving Omsk on July 12, then I spend a day and a half in Moscow with my friends, and then I'm flying through Hong Kong. July 15, 10 a.m., Auckland - here I come! :-)

A whole new life starts in few weeks. I wonder how will it go.

Hello, diary

This Friday I resigned from work. Which means that starting tomorrow I'm officially between jobs for the longest period in my life since I was 17. Well, actually there were few periods when I didn't go to work for more than a month, but those were not official, I was paid by the hour back then, and I was deeply depressed, so I couldn't really enjoy not having to work for more than two weeks straight.

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate work in general, and I definitely don't hate my job. It's just that I'm easily bored, and I often want to do stuff that I can't do while I'm on a day job. And though I have to do lots of organization right now to prepare to leave to Omsk, and then to Auckland, that still gives me more or less free schedule. And what do I do with it? Well, I procrastinate, of course! I hope this is just a temporary reaction to being jobless and not having to go anywhere. I gave myself today to do absolutely nothing, and I'm already a little bit sick of it. So, next week hopefully would be much more productive.

Aside from preparing to leave Saint Petersburg, these are my plans: I want to bring a little bit of organization into my everyday life. I want to start doing my 30 minutes of everyday writing at last. And some thoughtful reading too (already doing it). I have to significantly re-edit my article about testing to have it published on "Testing Planet". And I need to freshen my skills and knowledge in testing, and to dig into automation. I need my skills to be up to date in order to have better chances of finding a great job in Auckland. Because I want a great job, an interesting job where I wouldn't be easily bored, which would be a challenge, which would let me feel I'm making a difference.

I also want to try one more time to actually finish something on coursera. Problem with coursera is you better have a stability in your life when you go there. In my case there is no stability whatsoever, mainly because I'm bad in having it, but partly because of all the immigration story. I feel that now is my chance to establish some kind of stability. Not a self-made strict schedule, but something like a set of habits/rithuals to create a comfortable place in my life and in my mind. Some ways to be happy and proud of myself.

Of course it never works out the way I want it, but it gets better every time, and that's enough for the moment being.

It's been a while, I know... There's lots of news I can share.

First of all, I got New Zealand residence visa! It's not in my passport yet, but I got it in principal, which is awesome. Two days ago I returned from my one week vacation in Prague, and now I'm in a business trip in Moscow for another week... and after I finally return to Saint Petersburg, I'll have two more weeks of work in Yandex, one week to pack and free my appartment, about a month in my home city Omsk, and then - Auckland, Auckland, here I come!

Still, I need to send my passport to London and to get it back before leaving Saint Petersburg, and I'll need to buy tickets after that. All in all this is a very busy time.

Prague was awesome. I think it was my best vacation yet - with my dear friend, great food, beautiful towns, cozy bookshops, misteries and challenges, art and fun. I wish we had spent more time there. A month at least! Week is too small, you just start to get knowing the city, and you must leave the next day. So sad.
Also, Karlovy Vary is a perfect place to have a writer's vacation - i.e. a vacation to write a book. It's beautiful, slow and dull. D.U.L.L. Dull. You would write if only because there is nothing else to do. No distractions. Especially if internet is out of question, and honestly, internet must be out of question for the most time, or nothing would be ever done. Smart black hole is smart.

Moving on... I didn't have a month in Karlovy Vary, but I did have two evenings of writing my story. It's now 8668 words long, and my friend read it and liked it. She's the only person on Earth besides me who read a plan of the book and unfinished draft of the actual story. Of course there is an enormous amount of work left, but I move forward step by step... and she liked it. She said it is an interesting story. Of course, she is my friend, but this is exactly why I can trust her to tell me the truth.

Oh, and I also got tumblr. I'll fill it by random instagram reposts, quotes I like and posts from this blog. Let's see if that format would be comfortable.

Still no luck with my visa application

It's been two weeks, but both my officer keeps silence and my status on the Immigration New Zealand site is "Pending". It's killing me, I want to have an answer already, to be able to adjust my plans and move on! I need to know when I'll have visa in my passport to book airplane tickets, sell my appartment here in Russia and search for a room and a job, and I need to know whether I'm getting visa at all. Argh. Please don't be so slow, immigration officers and give me a Residence. I'll be good for your country, I promise!

For now I'm in a state of hanging between earth and sky, not able to do or think anything serious and efforts-consuming. I hate having to hang there, not knowing what's next and not having any power to make things go faster. =_= And why the waiting? So far even my employment history wasn't considered worth verifying. Does this delay mean that they don't want to approve my visa and will give me a Job Search one?

Skype Interview with a recruitement company went well

This morning I had an interview with Rachel, a representative of a recruitement company who currently works to build a Christchurch team for Orion Health. I think that it went extremely well. Rachel is a very friendly person and she asked questions that assured me she really does know what QA and testing is. We understood each other a lot better, than in case of immigration interview earlier. Connection was clearer, and she talked louder. I wonder if that's a skill recruitement specialists are trained in: to speak and understand overseas candidates.

Any way, I'll probably have next interview with Orion Health HR next week, and if that also goes well, I'll have a technical interview next. There is a real chance that they like me and make me a job offer. That would be a little miracle, of course: to get a nice job even before I actually arrive to New Zealand. But even if that wouldn't work out, at least I'll get some experience in interviewing for somewhat local IT market.

Orion Health sounds like an interesting place to work, and I really like the thought of challenge (new domain of knowledge, probably new tools and technologies to learn) as well as the thought of making a real impact on people's lives.

What did I learn from the interview? At least I can sell myself to HR. It has been a long time since I've attended technical interviews, so those might be harder to pass. Though I do know my area and this should be a plus even if I forget some terminology or other matter-of-fact things.

Immigration interview - check!

On May, 3 I've taken an immigration interview, which means that I am now in the final stage of Skilled Migrant program. I should have results in two weeks, it can either be "Declined", or "Residence visa granted", or "Work Search visa granted". Of course, I hope for Residence, but I can totally live with Work Search one. I don't see reasons to be declined, but that's up to immigration officers...

Anyway, if this works out, I shall quit job in the end of June, then I'll have a month to be in Omsk with my family, and in first days of August I want to be in Aukland. Fast, right? Like in that "Fast car" song: "lights so fast I thought I was drunk". Huh. I've already started to search for a job - I needed some replies from potential employees for my interview to demonstrate that I am actively preparing to start a new life in New Zealand. But I don't count on finding a job before arriving. Getting invited to few interviews is a goal though.

I think I'll get some Brainbench certificates in testing to enrich my CV, and I'll probably repeat terminology in English to be prepared. Maybe I'll even learn some new tools for automation or smth.

As for now, I'm in the middle of best two months in my life so far! My dearest lovely friend visited me for three days, and next week she and I are going to Kiev together. Weekend after that I'll visit her and my other dear friend in Moscow for our birthdays and Star Trek movie. And two weeks later the two of us will go to Praga for a week! I dreamed of visiting Praga since I was in school! And I can't believe that I get to share the experience with a person I love dearely and whos company makes me happy every single time... I'm blessed with this time. I'm blessed with many things, with many people in my life. A lot to be thankfull for. I can have a Thanksgiving every day, and never fail to find a reason to say "Thank you, Lord, life and everyone".

Wish me luck with the visa!
Also. Pigfits, Pigfits, here I come. Pigfits, Pigfits, yum yum yum!

Almost finished the first meeting

Draft is currently 6021 words according to google docs. Richard and James went from awkward politeness to a real freindly conversation which is an achievement for both of them considering the circumstances. And though they are yet to find a single common interest, I think, they already like each other. Also, I learned something new about James today. It's an interesting process: to get to know your characters better while you are writing, trying different angles and choosing what to leave.

Draft continues

This morning I felt good and dreamy. My good mood is in part a result of all the good things ahead of me, that I keep thinking about. I'll go to Moscow in three weeks to meet with my friends, and then two weeks after that me and my beloved friend will go to Kiev together for 5 days, and two weeks after that we'll meet again in Moscow and watch new Star Trek movie. I really hope all of this works out. It keeps me smiling for the last few days. Anyway, I felt good, and I used the mood to finally get back to my writing. :-)

Now my draft is 5209 words long or almost ten standard google docs pages. Again, it isn't much, but it is better than nothing. I am currently writing the chapter where Richard and James meet for the first time. It was really hard to start. I didn't know what any of them should say, but the thing is: they wouldn't know it either if they were real. That's why my clumsy writing seems appropriate to me. Richard is confused and he is afraid to screw up. So am I. But we are also both determined to get through to James, and I think, we are starting to succeed.

I'll use Richard's thoughts here:
"James seemed to be amused with all the geek references at this point. He probably thought his father was just a big baby. But at least they were having a conversation. And James was interested in getting to know him. That was a start."

These chapters are introductory ones. Main plot would take place after Tamara's death. And still, I feel that it wouldn't be right for me to go there until I draft the meeting properly. This is such an important period for both James and Richard, it determines their relationship in the future. Also, my guilty pleasure seems to be calling the boy Jimmy. I blame captain Kirk and his awesomeness. And Bones and his awesomeness.

New words and new writing

Another week, another non-written part of my draft... my writing course started yesterday, and in a week a course in quantum mechanics starts. So now I have 5 of them simultaneously. I fight very mild panic attacks when I think about it, it feels like a huge pressure is applied to me by all these courses since I try to attend to all of them. This weekend I was supposed to finish the last programming assignment for my Algorithms course, but I procrastinated. And yesterday I felt so sick I didn't even go to work, and I didn't study either. :-(

But I did wrote first assignment for the writing class. It's an introduction essay. I think I did pretty good, and it's also delightful to see how many people are there in the course who are enthusiastic writers just like me.

I am a writer of my life

First time I felt like a writer was in elementary school. Our music teacher gave us a task to write a poem about feelings we had while listening to Vivaldi's "Seasons". I wrote a short poem about spring. That was my first. It felt amazing, it felt natural, and I liked it so much it never wear off to this day. I'm twenty six now.

I enjoy writing. It helps me to think, and it helps me to express myself in the most precise way possible since I'm not that good in talking or touching. Writing gives me freedom and strength to be who I am. Through the years I did all kinds of writing: school papers, university projects, technical documentation, love poems, fairy tales, letters, reviews, co-writing games, fanfiction... I also have a daily updating blog since 2003. Lately I became interested in writing in English. It's my second language, so I don't feel confident with it yet, and I take every opportunity to learn. English is beautiful, and I love it almost as much as I love Russian, though it is completely different in rhythm and in spirit. I believe that writing is to some degree independent of the language itself, though I am ready to be proved wrong.

Sometimes I feel that I not as much live my life, as I write a story of it, picking dialogs and laughing at irony, assessing my troubles for dramatic effect rather than full heartedly suffering through them. Whether this is healthy or not, I am forever grateful to have such gifts as a language and a written word.
***

New words for today:

discomfited

confounding

cumbersome

incredulity

infinitesimally

Wondrous

Also, the words

debilitation

to sweep

surreptitiously

hootenanny

mesmerizing

Oops?

Oh, wow, so I haven't written a thing for more than two weeks. That's me. I do this. Well, it's not like I didn't see it coming - that is why I am not gonna cry "I ruined all of it! It's a point of no return!", and instead I'll just update this blog, and then try to return to writing.

Below are not excuses (maybe, a little bit excuses), but factors that I think are in the way of my writing.
1) Sleep habits. I am still sleep deprived, though I sleep 8-9 hours a day, and I go to sleep around 2 or 3 a.m. even if I try to do it earlier. Which results in getting up around 11 and going to work late, and coming from work late, and that's a devil's circle. No time or energy to write in the morning.
2) Coursera. Lately I've been doing a lot of studing via coursera.org and science related podcasts. Mostly coursera. It takes a lot of my time and energy, and it isn't like I spend them to watch tv shows all day, so I feel it's justified. But it also means I have less time to write.
3) ...nope, that's it. If only I could normalize my sleep pattern and stop trying to do many things at once (not happenning), I would be able to create a rithual where I write a little every morning. At least, I think so now.

Of course, I spend time to tv shows and reading fanfiction, but that's my leisure time, I need it to function. I cannot be productive 24/7 all of a sudden, that's just not me, who's been a lazy ass since forever.

What good in all this? Is there any good? Yes! Yes, there is!
1) all my courses and podcasts are in English;
2) one of my current courses requires writing essays in English, so I am doing this - I do write in English, just in essay form;
3) I got myself into two different courses for writing in English. They'll start later, and I hope to learn a lot about language structure, about common stylistic errors and about construction of a story structure.

I am not a totally lost case. Which is why I am back (muahaha!). I won't start writing today or tomorrow, probably, I have a lot planned for this weekend (need to do last two weeks and final exam for one of the courses and few smaller things for other 2 courses), but I am back. And I will resume my writing. Next thing to write is James' first meeting with Richard.